8 Tips to make it easier to talk to doctors

"I GET NERVOUS TALKING TO DOCTORS."

The kind of nervous that talks too fast, compliments the wall art, and then freezes up at the sight of silver tools. All the prepared questions vanish from my mind and I feel like I’m talking underwater - nothing sounding quite the way I want it to.

For some, these feelings of discomfort and anxiety are so strong they manifest as “white coat syndrome” - an anxiety-induced blood pressure spike while in a medical environment (and high blood pressure is not otherwise an issue). It’s estimated that 15-30 percent of people who have elevated blood pressure in office settings experience this syndrome.

Others don’t book the appointment in the first place. Fear of the unknown and, most recently, of the COVID pandemic has caused a decrease in routine screenings. According to research published in 2020 from the National Cancer Institute, it’s predicted that there will be about 10,000 additional deaths from breast and colorectal cancer due to poor screening rates during the pandemic.

While going to the doctor may be the last thing you feel like doing- here are some tips that have helped make me less nervous at doctors’ offices. The hope is: when you dread your appointments less, you’ll be more likely to stick with them on a routine basis.

1. FIND A DOCTOR YOU TRUST

A doctor-patient relationship doesn’t necessarily blossom immediately - and that’s ok. But it’s important to find a doctor you connect with and, most importantly, trust. So if something doesn’t feel right, trust your gut and look for another doctor that’s covered by your provider. Of course, you don’t have to like them as much as your best friends - but ideally, you don’t dread their presence - even if you dread the appointment itself.

Just like we ask friends for restaurant recommendations - don’t be afraid to use your network for medical referrals. Reading online reviews and doing a little research into their background through the Physician Compare tool on Medicare may also offer helpful insight. It can take years to build a team of medical professionals you feel confident in - but it’s worth it.

2. REMEMBER, YOU KNOW YOUR BODY BEST

Doctors are experts in their field. But you know your body better than anyone. No matter what you’re feeling or going through - your doctor should be taking you seriously. Period. One would think this goes without saying - but research shows that ableism, racism, ageism, and gender bias are prevalent in the healthcare industry. It shouldn’t be this way - and if you feel your voice isn’t taken seriously - find another doctor. You have a right to be treated with respect and professional care at every appointment.

3. WRITE DOWN QUESTIONS IN ADVANCE FOR YOUR DOCTOR (& MAYBE THE FRONT-DESK RECEPTIONIST)

Writing down questions is a nice way to support Future You. Rather than trying to remember everything, you’ll have a nice assist in the form of a notepad.

Most recently, I’ve also made a list of questions to ask the front-desk receptionist about COVID protocols (how many people are allowed to wait in the waiting room, does everyone have the expectation to wear masks, are there temperature checks?). If you’ve got something on your mind - ask it. Your questions are valid.

4. REFLECT ON WHAT YOU WANT TO GET OUT OF THE APPOINTMENT

Depending on the appointment, sometimes we don’t know exactly what questions we want to ask. Reflecting on broader topics - like any fears you may have or general ideas you want to walk away with - will hopefully give you a bit more clarity before sitting down with the doctor.

5. BE HONEST WITH YOUR DOCTOR

We expect doctors to be honest and transparent with us; it’s important to be the same with them. Lying or withholding information from doctors is not uncommon - but it could seriously end up harming you. The more information they have, the better they can serve you.

When I feel embarrassed sharing something - I think about how many patients the doctors have seen and how many stories they’ve probably heard. It makes me feel a little less uncomfortable.

6. CONSIDER VIRTUAL CARE

If the experience of being in a medical office is what’s holding you back from seeing a doctor - consider virtual care. Not all of your medical appointments and procedures can be done remotely - but it’s a great option when you want to talk about certain symptoms and conditions or discuss your mental health.

With Keep A Breast’s partner, Carbon Health, you can book same-day appointments from the comfort of your home. (Read more about this partnership between Carbon Health and the Keep A Breast App!)

7. COME PREPARED

So many things about medical appointments feel uncontrollable. But one thing we can do is come to our appointment with a firm grasp of our personal health history and family’s health history. I have a small pocket journal filled with medications, allergies, vaccination dates, surgeries, family diagnoses, biopsy dates, etc. (I’ve now become the resident health historian in my family!) It makes me feel confident and prepared if nothing else.

8. LISTEN TO YOUR INTUITION

If you feel like your needs, questions, or concerns aren’t being addressed - get a second opinion. Heck, even if you feel confident about your doctor - a second opinion still often provides important clarity and assurance in your health plan.

Again, you know your body best - and sometimes it takes a few visits to find a doctor who hears you in the way you need (and deserve) to be heard.

BONUS: 4 TIPS TO REDUCE NERVES BEFORE & DURING
YOUR VISIT TO A DOCTOR’S OFFICE

Keep these simple tips in mind before your next appointment. Sometimes the little things make a big impact on our experiences.

Bring something to distract you while you wait: For many, the phone is the best distraction of all. But if you’re like me and get frazzled seeing texts and emails come in when you’re already feeling anxious - books are the perfect mental escape.
Wear something comfortable (bring layers): Do you feel extremely vulnerable in those ultra-thin gowns? Same here. Consider bringing a sweater and a pair of socks. It makes those minutes (that feel like hours) between seeing the nurse and the doctor a little less exposed.
Meditate: Got a minute before your appointment? Take 60 seconds to breathe mindfully in your car before you get out. There are so many wonderful meditation apps (I love Headspace). Take advantage of them!
Do something you like after your appointment: If there’s something fun that you can tack on to your appointments - do it. That way, you’ll have something to look forward to, which will hopefully make the experience a little better. There’s a cute coffee shop near my gynecologist’s office that is my “reward” for getting my annual pap smear.

Ultimately, regular medical checkups are proven to help with detecting and treating chronic illnesses - and keeping us up to date on our vaccinations and screenings. They’re also opportunities to develop our own health literacy and feel more involved in our own well-being.

So if you’ve been looking for a sign to make your mammogram appointment or go to your annual physical - this is it!

MARIKA PRICE

CONTRIBUTOR
Marika is a copywriter and editor from Los Angeles, who is always adding books to read and places to visit on her bucket list. A former barista, teleprompter operator, and news producer - she found her happy home working in content. If you’re a fan of Greek food, pangolins, graphic memoirs, and anything involving women’s health, she’d love to connect!